Column #5 - The Nose Has It

So my Sensual Friends, what marvelous scents did you log in your journal? I hope you enjoyed your time out smelling the roses (and lilacs, and gardenias…)

My surprise favorite of the trip was a tiny little bottle of violet splash meant to go on after a shower. The scent was so faint and yet it lingered, and lingered, and lingered. And it made my mouth water. I have no idea why, but it was the most unusual thing I've found in ages.

My signature scents are vanilla and lavender, with lemon thrown in for days when I'm feeling especially sunny. I will be adding the violet to that list for extra special, deep-eye-gazing evenings.

Well, now that we have you ready to tantalize his senses, let's talk about setting the scene at home. How can you make your abode exude an extra sensual ambiance? Aromatherapy to the rescue.

Did you know that people's memories are emotionally triggered more often by scents than by visual cues? Our noses are a connection to our emotions, so filling your boudoir with good smelling things will make sure he remembers your encounter, and you, for a very long time.

The most concentrated form of scent that is easily available to the general public is essential oil. One must be very careful with essential oils because they are so very concentrated that they can be irritating to the skin. To use them safely they must be diluted in some fashion.

A word of caution that there are some essential oils deemed unsafe for use in the home. Most of the oils on the list are not exactly good smelling and are more medicinal in nature, but a few are pretty common: Sassafras, southernwood, tansy and wintergreen are some that should be avoided. Check the internet or a good book on essential oils for the most up to date information concerning these particular substances to make sure you are not handling anything that could be harmful.

You will be able to find essential oils on the internet, of course, but also at herbalists and craft shops. They can be a little pricey but a lot goes a long way.

The easiest way to dispense essential oils for use in your bedroom or other places in the house would be to create a misting spray similar to an air freshener. Add 8-10 drops of essential oil to a little more than half a liter of water and put it in a spray bottle. The oil will float to the top, but will scent all the water inside. Spray your linens, curtains, carpet and anything else a little water spray wouldn't hurt. Make sure to add more water when the bottle gets low. Spraying pure essential oils on surfaces in your home will most likely cause damage.

Now, what oil should you choose? Each oil will have scent characteristics such as fruitiness or spiciness. In addition, they will have different effects on you when you smell them. Some are soothing while others will be invigorating.

Here is a listing of some common essential oils and their basic characteristics:

• Bergamot: Sweet, spicy scent. Invigorating.
• Chamomile: Sweet, floral scent. Relaxing, calming.
• Clove: Spicy, fresh scent. Warming.
• Geranium: Sweet, earthy. Soothing.
• Ginger: Spicy. Warming.
• Jasmine: Floral. Soothing.
• Lavender: Floral, herbal. Calming.
• Lemon: Fruity, fresh. Invigorating.
• Patchouli: Sweet, spicy. Relaxing.
• Peppermint: Strong, fresh. Invigorating.
• Rose: Floral, warm. Relaxing.
• Sandalwood: Woody, exotic. Warming.
• Ylang-ylang: Floral, exotic. Stimulating.

Relaxing and calming scents are best for those first dates when you are both a little on edge. Warming scents are nice if you know each other well enough to laugh easily together. Invigorating and stimulating scents should be held in reserve for those very "special" nights when you want to give, or get, some extra bedtime treats.

Now, unlike my suggestion for mixing scents to find your personal favorite to wear, it is best to choose only one fragrance for each room and use it lightly. Don't use it too lightly though, since we've already learned that women are more sensitive to smells than men are. Just remember, you want it to linger and tease, not overpower your guest like pine cleaner when you've washed the floors!

One final thing to consider is that your man may have allergies or asthma or some other condition that would make the use of aromatherapy a definite turn-off. Having his eyes swell shut and his face turn beet red are not sensual ways to win him over. You may want to casually check with him to see if he has any problems with these things. Perhaps pass by a florist shop and stop to smell some roses. Ask him to smell them too. That should bring out any issues he might have in this area.

Hmm, I'm wondering, now that your bedroom smells divine, how comfortable is your bed? Are your sheets scratchy, are your pillows flat, do you have an old afghan Aunt Sally made you when you were six draped over the top of it?

Your bed should be inviting to you and your guests and that means plenty of pillows and only the best sheets you can find. Linens are a luxury and our next column will discuss choosing the best wardrobe for your bed to make it the haven you've always wanted it to be, a bed so comfortable he will never want to leave. From cotton to silk to satin to rubber. We'll cover it all and the uses for each.

For next time, make an entry in your journal and mentally redecorate your boudoir to be what you've always dreamed of. What colors would it be? Would you have a bed with a canopy, mirrors on the ceiling, perhaps a waterbed instead of a standard mattress? The sky is the limit in your journal. I can't wait to hear what you all secretly desire for that most sensual of spots in your home.

Until next time my friends, expect pleasure!